Every Little Thing
a parody of "Every Little Thing She Does is Magic" by The Police
written by Shay Caron
based on Ranma 1/2, which belongs to Takahashi Rumiko

(For the best effect, listen to the song and sing these lyrics along
 with it. Yes, sing. Ignore the funny looks you're getting from
 everyone else in the room.)

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Oh, I've tried before to tell her
All the painful feelings deep down in my guts
Every time she brings a plate out
I just lose my nerve, start runnin' from the klutz

Every little thing she cooks is toxic
Every meal she touches turns to dust
Every lunch she makes is a disaster
Every dinner fills me with disgust

Well, I have to tell the story
Of a thousand cookies burnt since we first met
But she never tries her own food
No, it's always me whose stomach is upset

Every little thing she cooks is toxic
Every meal she touches turns to stone
She can't even feed it to poor P-chan
Starvin' cats and dogs leave it alone

I resolve to help her out
With every recipe
Grab the right ingredients
So I don't have to flee
But my fears are proven valid
It'll cook too long, I know
Pretty soon my tongue is burning
Must I always suffer so

Every little thing she cooks is toxic
Every meal she touches turns to mud
Every time she hasn't learned to measure
Every time she bakes another dud

Every little thing she cooks is toxic
Every meal she touches turns to swill
But you know it isn't that important
I just wish she knew I like her still

(Ee-yu-uck, ee-yu-uck) (repeat to close)

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Every Little Thing
http://www.forresterlabs.com/fanfiction/Ranma/EveryLittleThing/
2003-03-27 -- Completed